Another contributor from the jobless #Pyjarmy, Sarah Murray has compiled a list of things the unemployed are just SO sick of hearing. Please share with your employed friends with the words “Hint hint…you insensitive oaf.”
The other day a friend of mine shared this hilarious blog post on Facebook, Ten things your single friends are tired of hearing. While I’m happily in a relationship I remember well these comments, and how unhelpful and infuriating they were.
It struck me, however, that there are many similarities between being single and having no job. Like being single, being unemployed seems to invite people to comment on your current situation quite openly, and ask probing questions they would never think to ask if you had a job – like, “How are you financially?” I’m fine actually, and don’t you have some business to mind?!) So, here are my six things your unemployed friends are tired of hearing:
1) Something will come along when you least expect it
Yes, I’m fully aware that even though I work my butt off rewriting my cover sheet a million times and constantly changing and updating my CV to suit each job description, as per every ‘Best ways to get a job’ article, I might just start talking to someone at a party who’ll tell me that they have an opening in their office and I’d be the perfect person for it (not that that’s ever happened to me). However, the thought that one day a job will track me down and ring my door bell isn’t comforting when bills and rent are looming, and I’m weighing up whether or not to delve further into my overdraft. If that job could give me more of an idea of the day and time of its sudden appearance, I might be more relaxed about the situation.
2) No one ever gets their dream job
Thanks for the encouragement, dippy downer! While I’m fully aware that I’m not suddenly going to become Editor of The Guardian, I wouldn’t mind a job that, ya know, in some way relates to the degree I spent thousands of pounds on. What happened to having a bit of ambition in life?
3) You can achieve anything…
It’s these types of inspirational cheer squad quotes that strap me into the emotional rollercoaster of job applications. I’ve lost count of the articles/videos/quips/sound bites that tell me not to give up on my dream. While they help to stop me crying into my Crunchy Nut every morning, countless rejections mean I rise and fall between dejection and delirious self-belief daily. Advice like this should definitely be taken in small doses!
4) …but perhaps you should aim a little lower
I thought you said I can achieve anything?
5) You’re too picky
You know what? I was too picky when I first started the applying, but now I’m probably the least picky person on the job market. I’ll take anything! Desperate times. That being said, please refer to point two. I still want to get a job that in some way relates to the career path I’d like to embark on, so excuse me for excluding a job spec for a finance writer when I failed maths and my degree is in history.
6) I got a promotion!
I’m so happy for you. Please excuse me while I celebrate for you by hiding under my duvet and crying myself to sleep.