Welcome to How to Be Jobless. Sorry about the mess. If you’ve never been here before, take a look at the About page, or watch the video for a general idea of what you’ve wandered into: This video started as … Continue reading
We all know it’s hard to get on the career ladder, but surely it’s easier to get back on? Erin Cardiff explains the tribulations of getting back into journalism after voluntary redundancy and a career break. I’m going to come right … Continue reading
Sometimes an interviewer just won’t like you. In these cases, nothing you do will ever impress them. Hopefully, it won’t be as bad as Andy’s experience, who found himself being interviewed by the love of his life’s ex.
Last week I asked you to send me your pitches for How to Be Jobless, and the response so far has been brilliant. First up commenting from the Pyjarmy barracks is Sean Cleaver, who thinks young people are getting entirely … Continue reading
On your jobhunt, you are likely to meet the odd negative nelly. The occasional tool. And a few utter bastards.
If you want to STAY jobless, invite them into your brain. Let them set up camp and do a shit in your self-esteem pool, until you’re so paralysed with self-doubt you don’t trawl through job sites, so much as scream at them to stop mocking you.
A great way to stay jobless is to damn yourself with faint praise.
DO NOT keep up to date with the latest technological innovations
Boast about the ones you do know about though, and if you can work in your love of movies and converting oxygen into carbon dioxide, you’re onto a winner. Joblessness will be yours to keep. FOREVER.
The appalling treatment of graduates continues! The Guardian‘s Hilary Osborne reports with suitable disapproval the humiliating grad scheme interview in which Alan Bacon (and other interviewees) were asked to DANCE for the panel of interviewers. Stay classy, Currys. He had ironed … Continue reading
Published 28/06/2013 on GoThinkBig “Dear appli-CAN’T, Thank you for your interest. Due to the high volume of applications we receive, only successful candidates will be contacted. If you do not hear from us within two weeks, please assume you made some … Continue reading
Build a rapport with the interviewer. Make funny jokes about bars you’ve been to, the pretentious terms bandied about in this silly old age…
It’s all building to that all-important moment: make a date rape joke.
ALWAYS make a date rape joke.